🌸 🌸 🌸GRIEF HELP🌸🌸 🌸🌸 🌸

This peace dove was screenshot off Amazon Merch

EVERYONE can relate even if they don’t do rescue. And when love is felt as strongly as you ahd I love our animals, the loss is physiologically palpable. I’ve gotten Flu symptoms from grief due to loss. It was a known upcoming euthanasia and I couldn’t spend the week I took off of work w this horse the way I planned cuz I suddenly had “the Flu.” As sook as that animal was in the ground at rest, my symptoms were gone completely. That’s powerful emotions taking my body in such a physical hold., 

We can and should grieve….But we can’t shut down and love the next one less. That one is coming for a grand dose of what we deliver. And it’s that one, the next one in, and your mustering up your grand dosage, that’ll heal your heart again. 

Listen, the hardest part is the accumulation if you let it accumulate. And you even hit in the answer yourself…. It won’t get easier but we just maintain a “mind set” about it. I had 28 animals one time that would nearly all be seniors at one time and in a variety of species that would “age-out” simultaneously (like you I had farm animals, domestic pets and I also do some wildlife having a wildlife biology degree) and it hit me prior that I’m going to go through a 2-5 run of roughly a death every 1-3mo. I had a big “holy sht” moment before it ever even happened. That clearly wasn’t the right mind set. Mostly I knew I’m always so heavy w “affected-affliction” for months after every loss… how will I live through a next death before recovering from the last one?!” I was petrified for awhile. 

Then I lost one. I did “work” which is something I hadn’t thought of had I not had that terrifying  epiphany earlier. Here’s what helped: 

#1: SAY EVERYTHING you have to say,,,,, good and BAD..  unload your guilt and shortcomings and sense of failure..apologize…. ASK them  for forgiveness. When we’re at battle for their emotional and physical wellness, we’ll always feel guilt for one not making it. Guilt is a named step in the 7 layers of grief. Know it’s coming. 

#2 put a cap or time frame on that part. You have no more than 2 weeks to unload guilt. Then to honor them and let their soul RIP, you are only allowed to relive the happy times. And you MUST relive happy times so that they get that love from you in heaven. And it’s in those happy times that your heart stays open and you find forgiveness for yourself for “failing.” 

#3 process your mistakes or shortcomings intellectually and NOT emotionally. it’s part of the human experience to “learn as we go.” This means at any one point in time…. There is much we don’t know yet. All we can do is the best at this time on our journey. And say this to yourself “ I am forgiven for the things I yet not know.” “I am a blessing for giving all of what I am and know currently.” And you are both forgiven and an obvious blessing. 

#4: think of your pet or loved one and picture them hurting the way you hurt at these times. Would you not give your right arm to take their pain away?! They feel this way about you too. They can do nothing for you from heaven and only hold the burden of your pain. This is an unfair burden. If you want them frolicking fields in heaven, you must free them of your pain. For them, let it go. Feelings are a choice. Situations happen… our reaction is what affects the quality of our lives. Choose happiness for them. Soon you’ll know you also deserve it.

#5 Our entire relationship counts & it all doesn’t boil down to the moment of it “ending” the way way we know it. And, our relationships do not end after they die. You can speak to them, joke w them, poke fun w them, laugh at prior incidents, confide in them and love them still. It’s never over. 

PS: you and I can forgive their aggressiion,  their distance, for not showing  trust when we know they should give it… they can forgive you too. 

You are perfectly imperfect and that’s just being human

All my love, 

JillsWholePetSolutions.com